On the first show, an hourlong affair, an instantly dislikable chucklehead host named Ian O'Malley shows us around the house while a dopey correspondent from CBS's dreadful "The Early Show", Julie Chen, acts enthusiastic as the 10 residents travel to the house, O.J. style, in a caravan of SUVs.
O'Malley shows us the house, including the confession room (where, each day, each resident is required to go in and share his or her feelings) and the bathroom (monitored to prevent the residents from sneaking into the toilet or shower to have private conversations). Meanwhile, Chen chats vapidly with the residents' friends and families, whom the show has gathered outside the house.
At the end of the hour, the residents finally arrive. They meet one another and go into the house. The door shuts behind them. They roam from room to room. A solitary Jordan is caught at the end, gazing at the cameras and the two-way mirrors pensively, reality dawning. It's a lyrical scene.
The group sits around the kitchen table, sharing their life stories. The best part comes when Cassandra, who works at the U.N., says she's from New York. "Harlem- asks cocky William, a little too quickly. "Midtown", she says calmly.
Eddie tells the others he lost his leg to bone cancer at 11, but never let himself feel sorry for himself. "There was no real period of 'Why me-" he shares. "It happened and I'll deal with it".
Jordan tells the group she's a triathlete, but doesn't let on she knows her way around a gentlemen's club.
When it's time for bed, William finds himself in the room with the women, and is dispatched tout de suite.
There's a test for the residents, Ã la the reward challenges on "Survivor". They have to decipher a cryptographic message that tells them where some money is. (The money apparently lets them buy food from the producers.) They figure it out, but realize they have to wait until the morning to go digging in the backyard.
The women have a late-night pillow pa
George, the dad from Illinois, and Curtis, the lawyer, get up early and dig up the residents' 0 prize in the garden.
The challenge today is fashioning a clock using two raw potatoes as the battery. The chore would bore even an eager Cub Scout to tears; the audience could be forgiven for noting that the "Survivor" producers had their cast eating bulbous maggots at this point.
The kids are going to get sick of having Mom and Dad around. Over breakfast, George gives an impassioned speech about his children: "That's my life, raising my family", he says. "You should know, it's not the sexual things, it's the companionship", he continues earnestly. Wonder if his wife feels the same way. He finally begins to cry. "I've never been away from them", he bawls.
This sends Karen to the confession room again, crying as well. She has been in the house all of 24 hours and it's her second visit. George seems genuinely to miss his family; Karen, by contrast, is carrying a lot of negative emotional ba
